I fought very hard to regain my health after a car accident in 1998 left me with a myriad of chronic pain conditions, one of those being Fibromyalgia Syndrome. I wanted to live the life I felt I should live. I had a career! It had always been about a career for me. Not dogs, not kids, not a husband! Some days it is good to step back and re-evaluate your life. Why are you doing what you are doing? Why do these ‘things’ mean so much to you? What would happen to your self-worth if these things were taken from you?
Everything can all be taken from you in the blink of an eye. No matter how sucky you think your current situation is… it can get worse. BUT. What we tend to forget is it can get better! It will get better! Illness creates a detour in our lives. Sometimes the detour is temporary. Other times the detour becomes permanent. It’s acute vs. chronic. The biggest challenge you will ever face in your life is to take that detour and realize it will be permanent. Your life will change, drastically.
I used to drive a new SUV and wear suits to work. Now I don’t even have a car, and I wear jeans or sweats. I take an über if I need to go somewhere or wait until my husband gets home from work to run errands. I shop at thrift stores, not department stores. I refurbish old furniture and sell things on Craigslist. I order my groceries online so I can stick to my budget and stop the impulse buys. We purchased a duplex. I take care of renting and paperwork for the upper level (we live in the lower level) and I determine our monthly budget. I write this blog and I co-authored a book.
At first, as the anger dissipated and my pity party came to an end, I realized this is now my life, better make the best of it. Afterall, I had read everything I could get my hands on. I had spent an enormous amount of money on doctors. I had tried every alternative treatment available. I did anything and everything I was told to do to try to beat this disease. I was exhausted, broke, and hopeless.
So I stopped everything. I stopped! I started doing what worked for me. I began taking the correct medications that worked for me on time, every day. I found the supplements that fit my needs and an exercise program that worked for me. I ate what I found to be healthy and stopped obsessing over food. I found new hobbies that I could do and that I enjoyed. When I was tired, I rested.
I found out who this new Kim was going to be. A 5’2″ blonde woman with fluctuating weight. I have a husband that loves me unconditionally as I love him. I am a dog mom, blogger, and an author. This is my life now. It is a GOOD life, a healthy life, a fulfilling life. Was it what I had imagined? No. It’s better!