I don’t really care for crowds. I’m not an extrovert. I was before fibromyalgia but now I prefer to stay pretty much isolated. It is easier to stay calm; prevent fibro flares and fog … At times I feel very little control over my health but I can control my surroundings. This gives me some of my power back.
It is an ordinary Tuesday and it’s almost two in the afternoon. I have fed my dogs, myself, and checked on my Facebook group. Fibromyalgia Talk with Kim, Karen, and Andrea. I am an administrator of this group with these incredible ladies. I answered a few questions, enjoyed some ‘admin’ group chats, and posted some relevant information.
When you are an administrator for a support group, you tend to become very over-protective. This is my group! These are my people! I am concerned for them, about them. And you may wonder, “why”? How did this attachment form? Why do you care so much? You don’t really know these people. You are not getting paid or punching a time clock to report for work … “why”?
This group has allowed me to find purpose. I have fibromyalgia now, for–these-people. I listen and I try my very best to provide answers or resources to what is so very hard to understand. I research and write for this group. I spend time with this group. I care about these people! I want to help, to pay it forward, as I was helped by others on my journey with fibromyalgia. There is no better answer to “why” than that.
The flip side is I am cared for by this group. They allow me to lead. They come to me with their questions and concerns because they believe I can help them find answers. They believe I will do right by them and I try my very best to meet their expectations. They have allowed me to find a purpose. This is nothing short of a gift! I have received a gift.
We had a “catfish” in our group. A person, a man we think, pretending to be a woman with fibromyalgia. Helene Pulinski [he-likes-pulling-shit] is the name used on Facebook. In a matter of hours, we discovered what was happening. This individual poured his/her very dramatic story out and then waited for the group members to come to his/her aid. And come they did to welcome him/her and support him/her. What did Helene Pulinski do? Waited for them … then tore them down one by one. HELENE PULINSKI, may karma knock on your door. Seek help because, NO, you are not handling your issues at all. To me, you are now nothing more than a passing thought … I will never write or speak your name again.
The group has become tighter, stronger, and more resilient! We have stronger restrictions for joining our group, longer wait times … We have banded together! We fought back and are stronger for it. This group of Fibro Warriors roared!
I don’t understand the nature of people who find joy in hurting others. Maybe that is the only way they can grasp ‘feeling’ anything at all? Maybe that is a coping mechanism for their extremely limited amount of coping skills. Is it ignorance? No, I don’t believe it is ignorance. When a person intentionally seeks out to do harm, that is a malicious person. Some people really are just mean.
A rattlesnake is a rattlesnake,
it doesn’t matter how gently you treat it,
it will strike. That is its purpose.