I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about people in my life, reflecting I suppose. Those that have come and gone. Those that I think about and miss, our relationship damaged. I think about the people I count on, who are still with me. There are those close to me who have weathered the storm with me by understanding they do not have the power to fix me. I think about the new friends I have made and wonder how I can be a good friend to them? I think about Father Time and what a thief he really is… I can’t buy back lost time.
There is a lesson that I have indeed learned and that is, I am taking back my power! I have said my apologies for my past behavior; most, not all, of it stemming from poor health. I have been very open and answered any questions, no matter how personal, asked of me … this has all been a lesson in futility. Circumstances remain the same. Opinions aren’t easily changed. So it is time for me to let go of these relationships because I have the power to choose that option.
I have tried to move on before and was unsuccessful. Systematic thought pattern always got in my way. This time I will break through those patterns. I will no longer dwell on what was and I will live for what is because I can feel the value of my life. I have done my soul searching and grieved for those I have lost, and those still distant. I believe with all my heart I have traveled down every avenue, I have tried to make things right. Living to somehow ‘right the wrongs’ of my past limits what I can achieve in the present. I am choosing the relationships I have now. Now, you may consider it a privilege to be in my life, and this privilege is not guaranteed. The past has been stealing my happiness and I will not allow for this anymore. Those in my present deserve all of my time and effort and I will give them as much as I can. Today, I am going to unwrap my present.